Art in the making

So I went to an art sale and spoke with some artists who have a wide variety of styles. I think I'm going to try to get back into it..

My new years resolution is to start crocheting. Until then, I did a 5 minute photo sketch...

Cold..

So I'm fighting a cold today..yup. I hate being sick. I felt it coming on last night just before bed. Woke up with a sore throat and I keep getting really hot and I'm groggy. I had a big cup of hot tea before bed and now I've gargled warm salt water, and been sipping tea all morning..which I plan to do all day.

I have Brian's mom on her way to come get Vada before I go to in home care for a few hours.

Praying I feel better this evening. Also taking vitamins!

New hair..

Well, I finally gave in and had an urge to change my look a bit. My husband constantly says to get bangs..I've been growing them out for over a year, was crushed when I went in for layers the lady trimmed them up because she convinced me it would look odd if I had long strands in the front and short layers in the back.

So..I did it.and I guess ill learn to like them until they grow out...

I have been contemplating it for a month and just did it. I have cosmetology training and used professional shears. I personally feel bangs are a lot of work and I have been very low maintenance.

Hopefully it motivates me to put some effort out more often.

A loss..

My husband's uncle, his mother's only brother was diagnosed this week with lymphoma and shortly after found tumors and cancer spread throughout his body. It was a total which something so serious could happen this sudden. Apparently, he had been avoiding the doctor for over a year.

His uncle, who I will remain nameless on here, was survived by his wife and two children, a son and daughter (my husband's cousins) who both have their first children.
He got to meet each of his first born grandchildren from each child this year..and now he is gone.

It's a very strange feeling to suddenly experience a loss through someone you hardly knew yet is someone who is so important to your family through marriage and surely brought everyone closer together. This last year, throughout my daughters first year..her second cousin was experiencing his first year right along with her. We went to my husband's uncle's for Thanksgiving, saw them at Christmas and I believe I last saw him at Easter held at he and his wife's home.

I would never imagine this to happen, to him..and so sudden.

My husband's aunt, which is his mother's sister has been fighting cancer for years..and it's gotten so bad to the point she only had so little time left. Brian's Grandma who has joint pain and other health problems was recently put on oxygen as needed..where we feared losing her this past summer. There has been two serious scares with his family for two other members of the family, who are still with is, thankfully. I have a rush of anxiety this morning, my husband went to say his goodbyes and be support for his cousins yesterday evening..and it's something completely new and unfortunate to experience a grief for others like this. They didn't expect it to happen this soon..nobody did.

I know this situation is not about me, I don't expect it to be, but it has left me wondering where we go from here. Brian's Grandma lost her oldest child, her first born only son..and Brian's mom lost her only brother, Brian lost his uncle..and his cousins most of all lost their father.
All I can do is be here silent, I'm no expert at losing people..I lost my best friend from my childhood and my uncle who took me under his wing nearly every summer until I was 14. I have had a very difficult time with both even still. I cannot imagine what Brians family feels..I can but I can't be sure how sure I am of it. My dad had a stroke 4 years ago, I couldn't sleep or eat and broke out in hives all over..it was very hard. I still worry about him everyday. Brian's uncle smoked most of his life and didn't take the best care of his health and avoided doctors...

It scares me because I know my dad's past affects him greatly today. My mom's brother is fighting liver disease..my aunt passed away on my moms side due to cancer a couple years ago.

If you have any concerns about your health, a swollen gland where it affects your swallowing and lasts more then a couple weeks, if you have pain constantly throughout your entire body, unexplained headaches.. difficulty breathing...please, get seen by a doctor. There are stages of cancer..and if you get checked soon enough it usually doesn't attack your body as rapid as it will after waiting too long. My step Grandma, my moms husband's mother has been fighting cancer for many years..we have seen her go through a lot of treatment and procedures. It is worth the fight if you find it soon enough.

It is very hard to see someone to afraid that they put themselves in the worst possible situation. When you do that, everyone in your life is affected by it. I woke up this morning and just knew...

I don't know why but I just felt like I knew Brians uncle was no longer suffering.  I'm very sorry and hope I can be some support, maybe this could help me learn and grow in an area I typically have a hard time with.

Mint chocolate soy milk

Is amazing! Also...50¢ of every purchase goes to toys for tots and coats for kids this winter! They also have pumpkin spice...which makes an amazing coffee creamer. The egg nog one is out too..but I'm not a huge egg nog fan..maybe someday.

My girl loves her kitty Raja

Thank you Raja for being so patient with Vada and accepting her love.

Raja is our sweetest and only kitty we could ever ask for!

Quit Facebook

Today I quit Facebook. Well, I think I did..I hope I did. I'm very much over seeing the posts from the people who share what they do every 5 minutes. I'm over being "friends" with those who only requested my acceptance to spy on me. If someone cares enough to be a part of my life they can write me an email. Everybody I want in my life is already in it.. so what's the point anymore? To boast on how perfect your life is..

I admit I posted quite a bit off and on, thinking I'd get opinions or comments from those I care to. I'm contemplating pinterest..like to actually get active on it. It's basically those follow who have the same interests. I do have strong beliefs and worries and interests..Facebook disappoints me, hurts me and disgusts me more then anything positive.

So everything else doesn't matter enough to be on Facebook. I didn't delete it however because I'm too unmotivated to transfer all my pictures I love. Annnyway, now that I got that off my chest.

Moving on to living real life and being interested in what interests me!

My girl

It's just so amazing to me how much my daughter has grown into this high energy giggly fun spirit to be around! She has always been full of energy, definitely not a boring baby..but she is even more full of energy, she laughs constantly, she kisses, she plays pretend so well and is in love with our kitty Raja. I am so in love with being a mom, I wish everyone could feel this type of love.

I just want to express how wonderful being a mother is, I have a hard time understanding those who think otherwise. However, I know everyone is different and had a very different life before motherhood. For me, so far in life..this is the only thing I feel is what I was meant to do. I thought having cats was amazing, now a silly energetic lovable girl..it's something else!

Vada loves her Elmo that Auntie Danyelle gave her, he's 18 and looks and feels amazing! ABC Elmo came from a home of 2 kids he cycled through, then Vada's two cousins, 8 and 4 had him...she is the lucky 5th proud owner! She loves her tickle me Elmo Grandpa got her, but he's more fun then cuddly. I think she finally found her attachment..who she loves to take everywhere! 

I just thought I'd share my joys since I though of it. Ahhh..Vada is my angel!

This drink tastes like it must be good for you ...

I could handle a gulp, but half the bottle is a serving..so I started chasing it with sugar free white grape juice. Hope it does me some good still.

I love fall!

All the foods are getting tastier, yet I'm being strong and keeping my distance as much as possible. I did give in to an autumn decorated cupcake from Chuck's Produce, it was amazing! Washed it down with some amazing almond milk.

Excited to wear all the accessories of fall, scarves, hats and belts with boots! The warm colors work better on my tones anyway. :)

Plus, I'm learning to enjoy cozy foggy mornings inside with my girl sharing Dave's killer french toast. Then our first outing of the day the air feels so crisp and fresh, it's like I'm finally appreciating the preservation of our beautiful NW. Summer says that are oh so green and beautiful wouldn't be that way if it weren't for the beautiful cool season to hydrate our environment around us.

I'm getting deep, I know. I just truly love the trees, birds and near by getaways surrounding us. Feeling very fortunate and then foolish that I never realized it sooner.

I really neee to find a hike or trail I can do asap, before it's freezing. Hopefully my next entry on here is raving about a small hike or good trail I got to do.

Excited to start back on the healthy wagon!

I cannot express enough how important eating healthy is to me! I already have a weak sweet tooth, so regular food I try to take very seriously. I am getting big into wheat grass right now, gluten and wheat free products are always something I find myself interested in. I'm however not a perfectionist at my diet, yet I want to be a good example for my daughter! I try my best to support local/organic farmers and prefer to only drink water. I am a fan of almond milk, almond breeze is my favorite brand..it just tastes best to me personally. I am excited to eat well and low Carb as much as I can before the holidays..so I took a picture of my proud portion of the fridge!